Week 9 Storytelling: Oh No You Didn't

Boys are stupider

Source: Generation Cedar

Sadie Hawkins dance was approaching, and Mary knew exactly who she wanted to ask to the dance. The only problem was she was too shy. "He'd never say yes. I'll just end up embarrassing myself. I think I'll just stay home that night, you know, catch up on some homework."

"Oh, just shut it. Go ask him. The worst he could say is no! Quit being a chicken." Mary's friend Becca had been trying to talk Mary into asking Dean, the captain of the football team to the dance for weeks now. "If you don't ask him soon, someone else will, so GO! Before it's too late."

"Okay, fine. I'll do it tomorrow. I have to mentally prepare myself."

"Geeze, you're so weird."

"Not everyone can be as outgoing and confident as you, Becca."

"Sure you can. Watch this." Becca walks over to Jake, the most adorable guy in our senior class. "Hey, wanna go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with me?"

"Yeah, I'd love to!" Jake replied.

"Great, see ya later." Becca walks back over to Mary. "See, it's that easy."

"That's only because you're Becca. I'm Mary. The nerdy girl with the glasses. Nobody even notices me."

"Well that's a great attitude to have. You can do it, Mary. Just go home tonight and practice what you're going to say to Dean because God knows when you get nervous, you forget how to speak."

"Thanks a lot. You're really boosting my confidence." Mary replied sarcastically.

The next day at school, Mary arrived more nervous than she had ever been in her entire life. As she walked through the entrance to the school, she spotted Dean. "Here goes nothing...Hey Mary, crap. I mean, hey Dean, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure. Shoot."

"Umm, do you have a date to the Sadie Hawkins dance? Because if not, I was wondering if you would want to go with me? I totally understand if you don't want to or if you have another date. I mean of course you probably have a date, I mean look at you..." As Mary continued to ramble nervously, she noticed Dean wasn't even looking at her. "Umm hello? Are you listening?"

"Oh, sorry. You were rambling, so I stopped listening. What was the question?"

"The dance. I was wondering if you wanted to go with me?"

"Oh, uhh yeah probably not. Sorry, kid."

Mary was crushed. How could someone be so rude. As she was trying to hold back her tears, Becca walked up. "Man, I am so sorry. What a jerk. Come on, I'll help you find someone else to go with."

"Oh yeah, like who?"

"Like that new guy over there. Today is his first day. I hear he transferred in. Apparently he's going to be the new captain of the football team. I bet Dean will be crushed. Come on, let's go ask him."

Becca walked up to the new guy sitting alone at the lunch time, "Hey want to go to the Sadie Hawkins dance with my friend?"

"Of course, I haven't made any friends yet since it's my first day and all so I would love to go!" The new guy answered.

The new guy became the new captain of the football team, Dean became a loser, and no one wanted to go to the dance with him. He tried to get Mary to go with him but she was now dating the hotty of the school. Poor Dean. The end.

Author's Note:

The original story, The Smart Chief Woman, is a story about a woman chief who trying to purse the man chief of his tribe, but because she was covered in blood and grease after making jerky meat, he would not give her the time of day. After she went back to her tribe to clean herself up, she presented herself to the other men of the tribe to find a husband, and when the man chief who had just rejected her noticed her, he wanted her. Because she was a "smart" chief woman, she rejected him and picked someone else. I found this story to be amusing because I think any woman would do the same if they had experienced rejection from a man because she wasn't all dolled up, but then once the makeup and hair is done, they want you. So funny!

Bibliography:
The Smart Chief Woman by George Bird Grinnell (1915). Blackfeet Indian Stories